The answer to: “Why you’re not where you want to be”
So, you’re running a business as a one-woman show. You have a BIG vision, you put in the work, you show up every.single.day to do the DO. You surround yourself with the right people, you show up online, the sign at your “show front” says open, and you serve some dreamy clients. But you haven’t reached that big goal yet, there aren’t enough clients yet. You didn’t retire your partner yet or haven’t upgraded to a house with a room just for your pet yet. You’re not yet world-famous. And so you question: “Why am I not where I wanna be YET?" When will it be MY time? Will I ever get there?”
And you might come up with reasons like: “Because I’m not good enough!”, “I must be missing something others have”, “My content doesn’t look as sexy”, “There are already so many people doing this, it’s hard to keep up”, “I fear I’m annoying when I sell more”, “I don’t feel like I know enough yet, I need to be a better expert”, “I’m not doing enough”, “I should be more successful by now!”
Let’s dive into what REALLY keeps you from getting where you want to be:
Because you keep on doing (and thinking) the same things that got you to where you are now and have an strong attachment to time.
With no adaptation, flexibility, curiosity, experimentation, risk, rule-breaking, or challenging - you cannot expect new results to come in. And with being fixated on a specific timeframe by when you want those results, achieve the goals and be that successful version of you - you don’t allow flow to come into your life, and that’s why it feels forced and hard to keep on going.
Yet, that doesn’t mean to neglect what HAS worked so far. It’s not about only doing things differently, or only doing what worked until now. It’s the marriage of the two that will accelerate your growth, results and therefore success. And it also doesn’t mean to not set timely goals, but rather than saying “It has to be exactly like this by the 31st of December 2024”, allow yourself some more flexibility by reframing it into goals like “I aim to have made significant progress toward my goals by the end of December 2024”.
In other words, it’s about upgrading your process and falling in love with it. Yes, yes you heard that before “fall in love with the process”, but it’s key. You have only this one life, life is in fact in itself a journey. The only destination is the deathbed. So make the ride enjoyable. Replace deathbed with any other goal, it’s just temporary, it’s fleeting. A new moment of “now” will come an replace it. A new goal will appear for which you got to go on to a journey.
Start romanticising your journey, do what you love, try out new things, make the things that you hate easier on yourself, simplify, reinvent, delegate, take yourself on dates to get new experiences and learn more about business, serving, marketing, selling, creation, writing, etc.
In terms of your mindset, to put it differently your mindset is what you focus on, believe and the perspective you choose to see the world from. So I want to invite you to shift your mindset from a future-focus to now. That doesn’t mean you loose sight of your goals, on the contrary, you’re focusing on the now with purpose. This way everything you’re doing now has direction and is aligned with what you want to experience. That can still be goals you haven’t reached yet, but it also includes to have the “now” as your goal.
With this never-ending moment of now, what can you do more of that will keep you going and what can you do differently, better, less of to keep you going?
This is a practise to be done every single day, and especially when you feel down and those feelings of selfdoubt creep back up. You’re exactly where you need to be, and where you are right now makes sense because of what you have done until now.
Make the best out of the time that you have and keep on going. The “where” you want to be has been here all along, it’s now, in this moment.
I know this blog is about limiting belief and thoughts… but you know what it’s also about?
Becoming your best self!
If you want to feel like a badass who has her shit together and makes STRIDES towards her own version of success, I dare you to start shifting your mindset. This is what I help you do inside my membership, the Best Selves Club.
